Nature: The Boston Terrier

In its natural habitat — warm dwellings with plenty of soft surfaces — the Boston terrier is a cunning one. She lies in wait, biding her time as you snooze, eyeing the vacated half of the bed.

First, she’ll approach your sleeping mass and poke you in the face with her paw. This is the universal symbol for, “Lemme in. Lemme in now! Hello?” Then, she’ll shape-shift, somehow taking up half of the bed, fully stretched out. She’ll crawl slowly north as she overheats under the covers. Once she surfaces, she of the snub nose, will make any number of her regular snorting noises. Since she is now right next to your ear, this finally wakes you up. You’re left wondering how this came to be, exactly.

Tricksy Boston. I was lucky to make it out alive.

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